Play a game with me! The ABC's of care giving!

B is for brushing teeth  , or rather lying about having brushed teeth when anyone can plainly see or smell that they didn't  .     Can I do 2?    hmmm  

B is for bawling.  When the parents just aren't the parents anymore.      okay whose next???

C is for "crisis avoidance" or if that doesn't work, "crisis management." It seems like there is always something brewing or happening.

Ok, I’ll play. 

D is for Disability,

Not fun but just the same,

It offers the facility

To play this thoughtful game.

The one I love, I must confess,

Who rarely complains to me,

She has a life of helplessness

Because of Disability.

thanx, Missy, for this cool game!  we're at E, and for me E is for ENERGIZING.  i'm 66, and a long time ago now (actually a bit over 4 months ago, sigh...) when i was only 65 my life had more Meaning than it had ever had before, even counting all the kids with special challenges i've had the joy of teaching and tugging into all their potential for 3+ decades!  From just before Christmas '07 til after Easter this year, i got to come alongside my Mom, her with her Alzheimer's and me with my autism ~ and, oh, what a blast we had! 

Always before she was so, so much too big for me and i was so, so much too disappointing for her ~ but NOT this precious time when we were such a team together day after day, getting her ready to meet the surprises we both looked forward to each day, loving each care-sharing moment of helping her be and stay comfortable in her not-so-frail, very feisty body and very fragile, not-quite-as-feisty-as-before personality. 

Yes, ENERGIZING is how i remember those too-few days before my second Dad, her sweetheart since he was 19 over 60 years ago, made it clear to me that his grief couldn't handle our fun together.  So, his love for her, and my compassion for them as a couple, sent me away.  Wanted y'all to know a kind of different perspective, and the great-full heart to Jesus i bring back from tHIS so precious seaSon. May y'all be ever Blessed and Energized in this seaSon you share with your loved ones...and they with you! val  (i'd love to hear from any of you at gollyboy@peoplepc.com)

I [disaboom.com]can see two for F, frustrating and fun.

It can be frustrating when my son is having a bad day or a problem that my wife and I just can't figure out from the  signs signals he is trying to give us. You want to relieve the situation and you try everything but nothing seems to do the trick.

Fun: When things are going well and you realize that care giving doesn't have to just be drudgery, it can be great together time too.

This are all so great!  Is it cheating if I add another even though I started it?  I guess since it's my "game" I can make the rules!  LOL 

G is for "Getting up"

We struggle with my dad to get him moving.  He's able to walk and move about, but has pain in his legs and just generally likes to lay and sit down.  On an average all he does is walk from the bed to the bathroom.  The bedroom to his recliner.  From his recliner to the table.  From the kitchen to bed and so on.  His sendenary lifestyle is always a concern for me and something I wish I could motivate him to change.  He seems perfectly content, though, to just sit or sleep all day.  That makes me sad sometimes.  We're scheduled to vacation together in a few months and I have no idea how he'll make it, though he insists he'll be fine.

Ok. this is great... I guess I take the " H"

"H" is for Happiness that my patients bring to me when they bond to me and me to them. We laugh and we cry together and we share our stories. In the end, The "H" is still for happiness for the joys we brought to one another and the gifts of love we gave to each other. Plus "H" is for happiness as they said they would put in a great word for me when they went to ( There's that letter H again) HEAVEN

heitzmanndiana@hotmail.com

I'm new -

I

Immune.

Immune to the pain that comes....

What a fun thing!!!

J is next and I will say jewels. Each and every one of the residents that I have the pleasure of working with at the  Assisted Living community are definately JEWELS!!!  Each many faceted and unique individuals indeed!!

 K must be for Kindness.

How kind it is to care for another person. Sometimes when patience is wearing a bit thin, it may be difficult, but those are the times to remember to add a little extra compassion.  

No one planned to need help.  After a lifetime of independence, it is frustrating to need help for even the smallest -- or sometimes the most private -- activities.  It is hard to ask, and sometimes even harder to accept, when help is needed.

It is in those frustrating, demeaning, heart-breaking instances when Kindness is an effort that it is needed most.

Yes, K is for Kindness, the King of hard situations, a synonym for caring.  And don't forget to be kind to yourself.  Caregiving is not easy for the cared or the carer.

L of course has to be for love; it helps make the caregiving sweeter

Their love for you when they tell you thank you for coming and helping making you remember it should be you thanking them for doing for you when you couldn't do for yourself; if they hadn't done that first you wouldn't be able to be doing for them now

M is for MEMORIES.

N is for necessary. Sometimes we have to make difficult decisions with and/or for our loved ones in tough times, but we must always keep their best interests in mind and that can be very difficult.

"O" is for the "Opportunity" that I have to share joy with my patients and to make them happy as they make me, and to lift their spirits in their darkest times.

P is for PURPOSE.  The elderly often lose their sense of purpose, so let's work at giving them some.

all the wonder-Filled gentle Quiet times with Mom...that's my "Q" for thank-full-ness

R would be for RESPECT.  For them and for ourselves.  Actually, I have two!

R is also for RELAXATION.  ;)

Great idea! I especially loved grjenkin 's - you get bonus points for rhyming!

S is for the selflessness of caregivers and for keeping our sanity! :)

T

T is for Time.

The most precious thing we can give a senior of al oved one who has lost some of there indpendence is time. time to sit and lsiten, or play cards or just be together.

Time is also important for the caregier herself to make sure she gets a respite and time away.

U is for Univeral Health Insurance.  Or at least the plan Obama has, which would provide the same coverage for us that our Senators and Congresspeople have!

U is also for UNWAVERING love and compassion we have for the folks in our care.

V is for voracious, which means having a huge appetite.  My parents are voracious for time with loved ones.  I think it's so easy to get wrapped up in the day-to-day schedule of my own family that even when I do spend time with them, I'm often watching the clock.    I always feel guilt about it hindsight.  I wish I could be more like my parents in their ability to just enjoy.  It's the old cliche about stopping to smell those roses.  I love my parents for reminding me too!

W is for wonderful if my father had not lived with me for the past 3 years,he probably would not be here at all and I would not have learned all the wonderful things about him that I never knew before. Each day is an adventure he had planted me the most beautiful rose garden you have ever seen and tomatoes and cucumbers in his garden. He has survived WWII, cancer twice and will turn 87 next month and each day with him I consider a blessing. Thanks for this opportunity to tell you how rewarding it can be to have them live in your home and be a part of you life. You do have to give up some things but the rewards from him are so much greater. There is no guilt........

X is for xtra [with a silent e] time needed to tend to all the chores that are now under your control.

My husband is in the early late stages of AD & I am getting to the point  of total depression  that 

must be hidden from him .He cries very easily & after 56yrs. of marriage it hurts to watch

this happen.

Y is for YOUTH.  Enjoy it while you have it.

Snooks, do you have help?  You need a local support group for aid physically, emotionally and spiritually.