I have to say I am having a hard time dealing w/ my father's Alzheimers. My 28yr old brother passed away 3 years ago and it seems since then my father keeps getting worse at a rapid rate. He's only 56 yrs old. He can't drive anymore, read directions, fill out forms, read a clock, think of everyday words (ex: couldn't remember the word 'cheese') pretty much anything involving everyday life that we all take for granted. My mother and him were looking forward to early retirement; taking off camping in their trailer and taking road trips. They now have to sell the camper/truck because he can't even remember how to hook up the battery. It seems everyday for him is worse than the previous. He is so frustrated. My mother is no help.....she's constantly yelling at him and feels she got jipped out of life with her husband. I keep telling her it's OK to ask for help and to stop yelling at him....it's not helping. If he's deteriorating this quickly, how soon will the time come when he doesn't remember us? I have no idea what to tell my kids (ages 5 and 10). My 10 yr old learned how to play chess with my dad and they would take up an afternoon playing. Now my dad has no idea how to play. This is awful....watching my strong proud brilliant father go before my very eyes. I am just glad I have found a place where I can express this to people who will understand.
Father is only 56yrs old w/ Alzheimers
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LauraL responded about 1 month ago :
Oh, Michelyn, I'm so sorry! What a heartbreaking situation.
I have a ten year old son myself - I think, but you would know better, that he may well be old enough to understand what is happening and how he can be patient and help his grandfather out.
My own grandfather took a real downward turn when my father passed away - the loss of a child, even if that child is an adult, is really hard to take and in my own humble opinion could very well have been an instigator in this.
Your mother may want to speak to a therapist to help her with her anger - I can understand it, but you're right, yelling at him doesn't help either one. I'm so sorry about that. :(
Please keep us updated and I hope things start to turn to the better.
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love torn responded about 1 month ago :
Michelyn, That is so very sad & diffulcult for the whole family . I also am in the same situation as your Mom . Although I try not to yell only I do find myself raising my voice at times of stress (like his driving). My husband now 60 was diagnosed at 58 just after he retired early after being there 39 years plus. We are dealing with the driving issue but it is hard . He has his swcond driving eval in a few weeks . Mean time he insist's on driving everywhere we go. He is constantly asking me for directions , even to places a mile from home.He is impatient at the stop light's hates when people pass him etc. I will need to hide his keys soon. He also played chess and every card and sport game amanagenable . We have been spending quaity time with our children and grand daughter . For your children I sugest a book called '"Grandma has Cobwebs" . Chidren I find are even more excepting once they know there is a problem. Your mother will need all your suport and help which sounds like she already has from you . 1 day at a time is what I keep saying to myself . All my best to you and your family. Love Torn .
