dealing with stage 3 at home - help???

I care greatly about my neighbors - an elderly couple - whose wife is in stage 3 Alzheimers. This was an extremely fast progression. Her husband managed to get her back home so that they could spend one last summer together. I'm worried about him though... She doesn't know him many times and has become hostile when she thinks he's a stranger. She is not very cooperative a lot of the time. He knows that very soon she will be gone for good, and it breaks his (and my) heart. He has very little resources & no help. I need to find some advice for him to use in dealing with her at home. He will not send her away right now, we live in an extremely rural community and he is too proud to let me 'interfere' too much (he did agree to let me go online to look for advice). Please help!

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Started by D.M.M. on 2 months ago

RevYarb responded 2 months ago :

Hi D..M,
If this gentleman is elderly you must swiftly compel him to see that his wife needs to be in a skilled nursing facility or if he is able to allow a full time private live in nurse to come and care for her. Inasmuch as dearly as he loves his wife, she will eventually become too much for him to handle (physically and emotionally). If he is dealing with this alone he may quickly find himself to the point of a nervous breakdown.

Thank God you are compassionate to be supportive of this situation.

Keep me posted.

Bless Your Spirit!
- RevYarb

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Heather responded 2 months ago :

Dear DMM....
My thoughts are along RevYarb's.... I run a private pay home health agency... and there comes a time when it is vital to get help for the safety of both the caregiver and the patient.
Recently, we had a very similar situation. It broke the wife's heart to put her husband in an Alzheimer's nursing home, but for both their safety and her emotional and mental well being she finally agreed. In retrospect, she is SO glad she did as he got the help she was NOT able to give even with an agency caregiver coming daily for eight hours.
The husband needs to realize this is NOT the lovely lady he married!!! If he continues to put himself at risk and does in fact get hurt... what happens to her then??? Just a little something for him to think about... This can be a very serious situation!!
Good Luck.... H

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