Interesting Article on Eldery Drinking

Thanks, Lisa -- it's good to have somewhere to go to talk about this. My father has been drinking for years, but refuses to get help or even to acknowledge his problem. He's gone through 2 marriages, and is now living alone, and his life has grown very small. He has few friends anymore, and seems content to just be alone, drinking. I've spent years going to Al Anon, which has helped me a lot, but I still feel a lot of rage at my father for what he's done to himself -- and to his family. It's such a waste. My children don't much enjoy spending time with him, and I don't really blame them. He avoids family get togethers, and when he does come, he's in his own private alcoholic haze. I know I should feel compassion, and sometimes I do, but often I am filled with ugly emotions like contempt, anger, embarrassment.  I know this is a rambling comment and I'm not sure there is an answer, but I'd love to hear from others if you have any ideas, thoughts, suggestions. Thanks

Welcome and ramble away! I can identify with every single one of your emotions- anger, embarrassment, etc. It's so hard to see a parent live this way and it seems even worse when there is grandchildren involved. I felt like I was constantly trying to shield them from the "real" grandma and grandpa.

As for suggestions, I benefited greatly from seeing a counselor. It helped me sort out the various emotions you described as well as develop strategies to ease my stress level during family get togethers. Al-Anon was also very helpful- it was great to be around those who understood exactly what I was going through.

Please come back anytime to vent- that's what we're here for!

Lisa