Here are a few more of our favorites:

1. If you have to identify, in one word, the reason why the human race hasn't achieved, and never will achieve, its full potential, that word would be "meetings."
2. There's a very fine line between "hobby" and "mental illness."
3. People who want to share their religious views with you almost never want you to share yours with them.
4. You shouldn't confuse your career with your life.
5. No matter what happens... somebody will find a way to take it too seriously.
6. Nobody cares if you can't dance well. Just get up and dance.
7. A person who is nice to you but rude to a waiter isn't a nice person.
8. Never lick a steak knife.
9. Take out the fortune before you eat the cookie.
10. You should never say anything to a woman that even remotely suggests that you think she's pregnant unless you can see an actual baby emerging from her at that moment.

-- Anonymous