Help! My mom's in hospice and my sister and I are arguing about her funeral.

My dad died 10/17/08. He had a prepaid plan to be cremated. They never told him that all his surviving kids would have to sign a paper to agree to his wishes. This is state law so we were told in Texas. What a crumby surprise as my dad lays dead in my daughters bedroom!!!!!!! Also a person while living can have an attorney draw the paper that after a person is dead a specific named person can have power over the body remains. No one told us this ither, and this is different than a durable power of attorney.

My mom asked to be cremated as well, and my sister and I would not have done anything except for what she wanted. There was a funeral and she was cremated after the service.

It's your mom who is dying, not you. You should be abiding by her dying wishes out of respect for her!!! Spend the time you are arguing about in a more productive way, like quality time with your mom and doing something to make her day a little brighter. She would, I'm sure, do that for you.

A compromise is very easy: have calling hours and then a cremation with a ceremony after that. Calling hours allow the friends to help family members begin the healing process. Limited calling hours, for example: one day from 4 to 8 pm is sufficient.

I agree with last two ladies - give us what we want or asked for, period.

Get a grip on yourself! If your mom didn't want to be covered up with dirt when she was capable of thinking....why would she change her mind now? My codicial to my will states not only that I shall be cremated, but allows $2,000 for a big party and not a funeral! That sounds like a far, far better time than standing around smelling flowers and hearing sad music! Give your mom a break here.

My mother and I talked many times about what she would like and I followed what she wanted no matter what anyone else thought. I think the final loving act you can do is do what your Mom wants done. I really felt that she would have been very happy and at peace with all of her requests done as she wanted.-The apple don't fall far from the tree.

My father and his brother went through this recently with my grandpa. The sibling who has the parent living with them feels like they have the most say - even if it contradicts what the parent might have said in the past.