Does Caring for a Sick Family Member Raise Your Stroke Risk?
By Melanie Haiken, Caring.com senior editor
If you ever needed proof that caring for an aging or ill family member can be bad for your health if you don't pay enough attention to YOU, here it is. Researchers at the University of South Florida studied close to 800 people caring for a sick spouse and found that those who reported caregiving as "stressful" were 23 percent more likely to also rate at high risk for stroke based on traditional risk factors.
The connection between stress and stroke was particularly strong for husbands caring for ailing wives, said psychologist William Haley, who led the research team and published the study in the journal Stroke.
The researchers measured each participant's stroke risk using the Framingham Stroke Risk Score, which assesses a series of risk factors such as blood pressure, cholesterol, diabetes, smoking, and age, and then delivers an overall stroke risk. Then they rated the participants on the degree of "strain" they were feeling from their caregiving role, using a standard score based on how many days during the past week respondents had felt depressed, lonely, sad, or had crying spells. The results -- which are probably not surprising to those of us caring for ill family members -- showed that those who scored high on "strain" had stroke risk scores that were an average of 23 percent higher than normal.
So what does this tell us? People who felt "stressed" by caring for a sick family member were more likely to have high blood pressure, high cholesterol, diabetes, and other conditions. In other words, they themselves were getting sick, probably for two reasons.
1. The stress of caregiving was taking a toll on their bodies.
2. They weren't taking care of themselves because they were too busy caring for someone else.
Sound familiar? It sounds way too familiar to me. During the last year of my mom's life, when I was at her house almost as much as I was at my own, I developed severe back pain and my own blood pressure and cholesterol spiked. But I didn't even know about the hypertension and cholesterol -- it wasn't until after my mom passed away, when I finally made an appointment to get help with my back pain, that routine tests revealed the other problems. What do you want to bet that many of the caregivers followed in this study also didn't know they had conditions putting them at risk for stroke?
Interestingly, according to the researchers, the reason men caring for wives had higher stroke risk than women caring for husbands was not that the men were under more strain - rather it's just that they were less accustomed to dealing with such strain. Actually, both groups reported equal degrees of strain, but the men's stroke risk was higher. The researchers concluded that men are more affected by the stress of caregiving -- unless, that is, they were well off enough to be able to afford paid help. "Women are more prepared to be caregivers and show less risk tied to strain," said Haley.
The study left me wondering, though, about the different effects stress can have: those that are more external and those that are more internal. Men under stress from caregiving may be more likely to manifest their distress with visible symptoms like rising blood pressure and diabetes, but women may simply react to the stress in more internal ways. Depression, for example, is often considered a symptom of internalized stress. Would love to hear your thoughts on this.
I can relate to many of the posts here. I am 50 years old and have been taking care of my husband who is 25 years older than I for the past 1 1/2 years. He suffered a stroke (can't use his right side or speak), has aphasia, diverticulitis and cancer, while trying to take care of our teenage daughter, house, work, bills, etc. I have noticed health issues but can't seem to find the time to get the proper tests. He has grown children by prior marriage but they are useless to say the least. I commend everyone who is a caregiver. It is not an easy job. I wish you all good health and the strength to continue helping your loved ones.
I am caring for my husband who has dementia, Huntington's Chorea, dysphasia and COPD. It is frustrating and time-consuming. I am trying to stay involved with my own medical program, but I'm missing appointments, missing my book club meetings, missing my exercise class. Thank you for sharing the article, because now I will make sure I get to my doctor's appointments and things that relax me.
Hugs ckh, Janet Beeching
This is so true.I have been my husband's caregiver for over 8 years and my Mom's for 2. My Mom has Dementia and my husband has a severe case of the dwindles. My Mother is in assisted living and my husband is in full time care and has been since July. Last weekend when I was worried about how much he wanted to come home and how he was pressurring me at every turn, it all hit me and my blood pressure spiked to 208/110 a high risk fiqure. I didn't have time for a stroke but I laid down and did some meditation ( and okay, maybe some praying). Had two days of fear and then it stablized. Even after you get some help it's a tough row. My thoughts are with all of you going through this
Hugs Janet Beeching, Dagamar
This is the first time that I have found anything regarding stroke risk in caregivers. I took care of my Freddie for 8 years as he suffered and died of prostate-bone cancer. He was 5'11'' and 240 pounds when he got his diagnosis, he was 65 pounds at death. He also had a muscle wasting disease and diabetes. I was able to hire nurses while I was at work, and he was under Hospice care. It seems everything was a fight! Trying to get around the clock nursing care from hospice in the first few days of a crisis was nearly impossible, trying to find food he could keep down, changing him, going through surgeries and biopsys and radiation therapy. Getting little sleep because he needed me close and had to talk about things on his mind. Taking care of his bills, on top of my own responsiblities. Make a long story short, the year before he died, he was deathly ill, bed-ridden, and I was hospilitized myself 5 times for serious illnesses, starting with MRSA infection to my brain in January, and ending in an ischemic stroke that effected my vision, memory and coordination in November. Hospice took him into respite care each time, but after the stroke, he was 5 months in respite care while I recovered, and he died before he was able to come home. Not only does the lack of sleep, numerous crisis and having an entire room turned into a makeshift hospital room, with oxygen generators, catheters, stacks of diapers, pain medications and strangers from Hospice visiting and once even having a hospice nurse dip into his morphine and methedone medication, and finding her stoned lying prone in the front yard while he was left alone in the bed, soiled and crying. And all through this, knowing he's dying, talking about funeral araingements, making plans, and realizing you weren't living your lives together, but you are now helping him die. I guess we don't know what we can do until we have no other choice. People said I was brave, but all bravery entails is no other acceptable alternative. What else could be done. I loved my Freddie and he was always a gentle soul to the very end. Three years ago April 13 I closed his eyes to the world and he had a full military honors funeral. I burried him near our grandchildren, and I have the next grave over, we have a double-heart headstone for both our graves. I'm 58, he was 69 when he died. I'm still going through probate with nieces and nephews of his contesting every move. so there's still piles of stress. Again I'm not sleeping well thinking of going to court again tomorrow. Even though he had a will, and appointed me his executor, I'm told his family doesn't trust me. Freddie did, and that should be enough, but they are doing their best to put me through a ringer like I'm an ageing gold digger. His estate is minimal, but they don't believe it, and we can't change their mind with the facts. I wonder where they were when diapers needed changing, emisis pans needed holding, catheters needed changing, medicine given, and gentle meals planned in hopes he could keep anything down. Where were they when the doctor called about 'heroic measures' and I had to tell them that if he could not take food and liquid by mouth not to give him that support, and to ask for terminal sedation in his final days. He lived 5 days after nutrition was withheld. They were in Ohio, we were in Florida. During the time it takes for someone so ill to die, friends leave you alone, not wanting to see him so sick, there is no help you don't pay for, and maybe, if you're lucky, there's a couple of people you can talk to. Helping someone end their life is the hardest thing I have ever done. I loved him with all my heart, and I miss him every day. I wish for the day that this probate is all over and these reletives dissapear into the past. I'm about 80% recovered from the stroke, but everything is so different than before. My best to every one of you out there that has or is helping a loved one. The Torah says this is one of the most important Mitzvas. Another Mitzva I was able to do is to go to the funeral home and wash his body. My son helped to dig his grave. We honored him every way we possibly could. The grandchildren visit the grave, they are little, and they want to dig him up and bring him home again. It's funny to watch them, and sad to have to explain death to them again. G_D bless all of you, thanks for listening.
Hugs Melanie Haiken
Prayers Howcoolrutoday, Missy
Clearly the answer is yes though I take issue with the notion that men are not accustomed to this form or level of stress. I would counter by saying that men, in fact, internalize more anxiety than women. Regardless, both men and women suffer the same manifestations in the end (e.g. hypertension, chronic fatigue, depression) – how we get there is almost irrelevant. In my experience, there are nearly as many men providing primary care for their parents as women – and BOTH are equally challenged. I am 52, the only son of two elderly parents, and have been providing increasing and varying levels of care for 14 years. Mother (83) had two strokes - Father (79) has now had two strokes; most recently and sadly, just last week. Mother's 2nd was significant leaving her in a wheelchair and aphasic. Father's 1st minor stroke (6 years ago) resulted in progressively worsened vascular dementia yielding erratic, defiant, combative, abusive, and irresponsible behaviors ultimately forcing me to remove my mother from his care (he refused ALL outside help) and placing her in assisted living with power of attorney. After more than a year of "chasing" down my father, trying to get him help (when he would accept none) and cleaning up his "path of destruction" (that he created without reservation), legal actions were required finally rendering him incompetent with guardianship. While in a hospital this past week, he became violent, was physically restrained, and suffered a massive stroke – a sordid issue by itself. I am also the father of two teenage daughters - good kids with significant emotional issues despite every environmental and therapeutic resolution I could offer. The daily and never-ending grind of dealing with loved-ones’ health and well-being has taken its toll and I fear there is nothing I can do to prevent my own demise - chronic fatigue, hypertension, and the view that every day is sadly “ground-hog” day. With few “support” alternatives, I simply do the best I can for as long as I can with the hope that my parents can find some level of enjoyment in each of their waning days and that my daughters can become responsible, productive, and happy members of the community. I offer the perspectives that the stress of caring for others is genderless and sometimes unrelenting; never under-estimate the value and benefit that a meaningful support network of family and friends can provide; plan your contingencies (i.e. advance directives) accordingly but also anticipate the unexpected; and finally, take care of yourself the best you can and pray your inner strength and perseverance prevail in the end.
Hugs Missy
I cared for my Mom who was disabled by short term memory loss. My lighthouse in that rough sea was the book "The 36 Hour Day". It is often updated and it contains so much information about what to expect, what to do, who to seek, etc. Please get a copy if you are a caregiver. Amazon has it http://www.amazon.com/s/?ie=UTF8&keywords=a+36+hour+day&tag=mh0b-20&index=aps&hvadid=157578328&ref=pd_sl_8547ouup92_e
Hugs Lena Louw