Relationships / Family Conflicts Questions

1. How can I deal with my increasingly embarrassing mother in public?

   Let's start by addressing your mother's health. Anytime you notice a striking shift in someone's behavior, particularly an elderly person's, you should rule out medical issues. It's easy to forget about medical issues, because they're often invisible. If your mother has not had a full medical exam recently, see if you can arrange for one...
   1 Expert Answer, 1 Community Answer

2. What can I do if my family decides not to notify me of my loved one's hospitalization?

   It depends. What has happened among you and your family members so that they don't want you to know about your loved one's hospitalization?
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3. Are brain aneurysms hereditary?

   The likelihood of you having a brain aneurysm if one of your family members has one is rare, unless the aneurysm is caused by a hereditary disorder like polycystic kidney disease. Current recommendations state that if two or more family members (first degree relatives) have a aneurysm, then other family members should get screened with an MRI...
   1 Expert Answer, 7 Community Answers

4. Is it normal for me to feel resentful of my MIL?

   Resentment of your mother-in-law is quite normal considering the life history you explained. If your mother-in-law has not recently had a physical it would be helpful to determine if her being an emotionally driven person may be symptomatic of chronic depression. Often depressed elders cover their sadness with intense anger and abrasiveness...
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5. Is it worthwhile to help Mom create new friendships in her new communtity with moderate Alzheimer's?

   Your situation is shared with numerous, if not the majority, of children in long-distance relationships with a declining parent. A person with dementia is often able to keep up a telephone conversation for ten or so minutes without giving away her progressing memory-loss and confusi...
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6. What is it that could be done to get my extended and immediate family together again?

   Dear Just Being Me,
   1 Expert Answer, 2 Community Answers

7. My husband believes he often sees his father. Should I tell him it can't be?

   If I may take a philosophical bent, how can you be sure it can't be that your husband believes he sees his father?
   1 Expert Answer

8. Should we bring my 100 year-old grandmother to a family reunion?

   A few details would help me answer your question. First of all, does your grandmother want to go to the reunion? Secondly, does she have many other opportunities to see family members? Finally, how long and taxing will the trip be?
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9. Do I have legal rights to my partners ashes?

   Legal rights to ashes can be a difficult situation. Unless the deceased put something in writing, such as in a will or in preplanned arrangements with the funeral home, stating who he wanted to have possession of his ashes, they are frequently given to the one who paid the funeral/cremation expenses unless that person is not the next-of-kin...
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10. My partner is refusing cancer diagnosis and treatment. What should I do?

    When your partner is refusing cancer diagnosis and treatment, it is an extremely difficult situation for you both. In this situation it is important to engage your partner in what she says is the reason for her refusal. If she does not get treatment for her cancer it may be a short time until there will be nobody to take care of her baby...
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11. Can our family sue my brother after illegal sale of Mom's home?

    You want to know if family members can sue your brother for allegedly illegal selling your mother's home. I cannot give you a definite answer, only some pointers. The first thing you have to decide is whether you are willing to pay money to hire a lawyer. If you want to sue your bother, you'll need a lawyer...
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12. How can we protect our elderly mother from being taken advantage of?

    There is, of course, a chance that true love has bloomed between your mother and this fellow, in which case you may want to rethink your concerns. But it sounds as if you and others are pretty well convinced that it's money rather than love that's the prime motivation. And it sounds as if talking honestly with your mother has not changed her mood or mind...
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13. How do I deal with my wife's resentment over the time I spend with my elderly father?

    Your father is fortunate to have a son so committed to his well-being. Striking a balance between caring for aging parents and being there for your own family is never a simple matter. When we talk about the right way to care for ailing elders, there are no perfect answers, because what we're really...
    1 Expert Answer, 5 Community Answers

14. How does a quit claim effect our tax situation?

    How the transfer is characterized depends largely upon whether your in-laws intended to transfer the home as a gift or as payment for your caretaking services.
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15. How to make my mother accept taking her medicine and stick with her cardiologist??

    So sorry to hear about your mother’s recent aortic dissection and her persistent search for a doctor to discontinue her blood pressure medication. Many times a life threatening event, as the one she had, is enough to convince people of the importance of blood pressure contr...
    1 Expert Answer

16. Why is it necessary to get a diagnosis for Alzheimer's or dementia?

    It makes a big difference to get a diagnosis if one is experiencing memory loss.
    2 Expert Answers

17. How do I get my siblings to realize that it is important to be with our parents during the holidays?

    You didn't give many details, for example, do your parents routinely ask your siblings to come for the holidays? Do your siblings live far away? Are they not coming because of bad feelings, or for some other reason? Of course, you can't force your siblings to visit, whether you think they ought to or not...
    1 Expert Answer, 2 Community Answers

18. How can I help my demanding father -- without neglecting the rest of my life?

    When older adults give up their primary living environment, they feel out of control. Even if the new facilities and support staff are ideal, it may not ease the psychological discomfort that being in a new space can create. For most elderly adults, their primary living environment represents the last area of control they have in a world of mounting losses...
    1 Expert Answer

19. What can I do about my emotionally dependent mother?

    It sounds like your mother is lonely and depressed, and you are the easiest, most accessible target for her frustration. I suggest that you sit down with your mother and talk about the situation before matters grow worse. If communicating with your mother is likely to be fraught, you may want to see...
    1 Expert Answer, 6 Community Answers

20. My father died. Is he still watching over me?

    You have no idea how often this question is asked. Grieving is hard enough, but if we know that those who have died are able to watch over us, it sure does ease the pain. The problem, to some people, is that there is no way of proving, without a doubt, the presence of the deceased. For example, naysayers argue that it's all a figment of the imagination...
    1 Expert Answer, 3 Community Answers