Housing Decisions Questions

1. How can I find a private group home?

   You are absolutely right. Small private group homes are tough to locate. For one, they don't have the marketing budgets of the big places which is why you're not likely to find them in the usual places.
   1 Expert Answer

2. My mother will be 87 in March. She just survived an...

   Choosing a community that meets the needs of frail older adults is always challenging, and finding the best place for someone who is visually impaired makes that challenge greater.
   1 Expert Answer, 1 Community Answer

3. Should the nursing home tell Dad he should stay?

   In answer to your question, it's not the facility's responsibility to tell your father that he should remain in the nursing home. The physician may be willing to recommend this to him if asked to do so, but perhaps not even then.
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4. Is there housing that matches my mother's independent needs?

   Your question is about housing for an independent person. The one thing you did not mention is if your mother can walk. It sounds like a 6 and under board and care would be the best place for her if she can walk or get around by herself. There are hud housing board and cares. Call the Ombudsmen to get a list of the places in your area...
   1 Expert Answer, 2 Community Answers

5. How can we convince my in-laws that they need alternative housing?

   Moving from a family home is an overwhelming prospect for an elderly couple. Add on the physical and emotional burdens your in-laws are experiencing and it probably feels like an impossible challenge. But the care needs you are describing are only going to increase over time.
   1 Expert Answer, 1 Community Answer

6. How do I address the use of the stove with my mother?

   Wow, this is a tough situation for you. You mention burning food and the stove, which are extremely important, but I think you're at a point where the larger issue is simply whether your mom can live independently at this stage of her life, or whether she needs more support. If she's wandering and burning food, safety issues are a big concern...
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7. Should I Mom remain home with a caregiver, or move to a newer place with a caregiver?

   It sounds like your mother has a mild dementia. If so, she will feel safer in her familiar environment, no matter its condition. It is then up to you to determine whether she lives in a safe place or not. If she has any dementia, it is progressive, and she will need more care as time goes on.
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8. Should my mother continue to live in Ireland or move to the United States to be closer to family?

   You may wish to begin by determining what her support system is in Ireland. Do you have extended family, friends and relatives there? What services are available to her? Have you asked your mother where she prefers to live? It is understandable that you wish to have her here with you, but it may help...
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9. Mom's nursing home is kicking her out, but I can't care for her in my home. What do I do?

   You appear to be looking for options when your mother is evicted from a nursing home. First, I would seek a complete medical evaluation of your mom. If her behavior is a problem, there may be medical reasons which have not been fully considered or appropriately treated. Seek the input of a neurologist and a psychiatrist...
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10. Considering my parents health, how can they live in a hotel for two to three months?

    Both of your parents would do better in an assisted living community than in their house, or an apartment. Both of them need nursing supervision. Ask the insurance company to pay for their care in the assisted living during the time of the mold clean up, and after that, it's up to your family...
    1 Expert Answer, 2 Community Answers

11. How can I prescreen assisted-living facilities so I don't have to tour every one?

    Start by asking your local Area Agency on Aging for a list of the facilities in your area. Once you have your list, call your local ombudsman for long-term care and ask if complaints have been filed against any of the facilities. Not all ombudsman programs will supply this information, but it's worth a call to find out...
    1 Expert Answer, 2 Community Answers

12. Are there special housing facilities for Parkinson's patients?

    As far as I know, there are no retirement communities dedicated to Parkinson's specifically, although some may offer special support to those suffering from this illness. My mother had Parkinson's and she lived out her entire life in a retirement community. At the end she hired her own caregiver, but she was able to function...
    1 Expert Answer, 1 Community Answer

13. How can I ease tensions between my grandmother, myself and my roommates?

    Your situation sounds difficult, and I'd be willing to bet that tension among the roommates is the least of your problems. For instance, how do you feel about giving up your room and sleeping on the couch indefinitely? If your grandmother can't contribute to the household expenses, does that mean you have to pay her share...
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14. What are the housing options for my parents who are filing bankruptcy?

    Although your parents are not yet ready for supportive housing, it is best to plan ahead. You should review the information on your state websites to find local programs such as HUD, low rent options for seniors and housing choice vouchers.
    1 Expert Answer, 1 Community Answer

15. What is the process for getting a loved one placed in a care home?

    The process of moving a person with dementia to a care home is one that's often left to the family or the person who has durable power of attorney (DPOA). If an older adult with cognitive impairment has neither family nor a DPOA, the state would step in and appoint a guardian to make decisions about care...
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16. How do I deal with my husband insisting Mom live with us when I don't want her too?

    Conflicts between spouses about caregiving arrangements are common; I call ElderCare a 'marital problem'. Caring for an older parent takes time from children, careers, and together time. It can be rewarding but it is also exhausting.
    1 Expert Answer, 22 Community Answers

17. How do we deal with Mom's emotions and denial about her new living arrangements?

    It's a tall order to cope with Alzheimer's, your parent's emotions and moving. In communicating with your mom, realize that your feeling guilty may cause you to need to justify and explain what you're doing. It isn't necessary to give your mom with Alzheimer's too much information. It will not make her feel better to justify and explain a lot to her...
    1 Expert Answer, 2 Community Answers

18. Which housing option is best for someone with diabetes?

    You have a few options to help your mother get the care she needs. Start by speaking to the Director of the board and care facility about your concern. Is it in their policy to not perform glucose monitoring? What were you told when your mother was being admitted to the facility? Ultimately, board and care facilities make their own rules...
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19. Dad took his name off the title; now he wants to move back in!

    You are wise to recognize when it no longer seems possible for you and your father to live peaceably under the same roof. And there should be fairly simple legal solutions to accomplish your wishes: allowing him to live in the house on his own until he moves out or dies...
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20. When is it time for Mom to move into an Alzheimer's unit?

    My heart goes out to you, because you’re not only dealing with the issues of a mother showing advancing signs of Alzheimer’s disease, you’re also dealing with aspects of her mental health and the fear that her threats of suicide are real.
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