Provide help

• Lend the primary caregiver an active hand, perhaps preparing a meal or tackling a cleaning chore. Observing and participating in the person's care will also help you identify other areas where you may be able to help, like replacing a small appliance that's not working properly or sending flowers on a monthly basis because she enjoys them so much.
• Plan your visit with the purpose of giving the primary caregiver some respite, if you can. Day-to-day caregiving can be time-consuming and exhausting. Caregivers need an occasional break. If you're uncomfortable doing this, start with short outings or day trips so you can learn the ropes, and work up to weekends or longer stints.
• Don't forget to build in leisure time for you to spend time with the person. Join her in relaxing activities such as looking through photo albums or participating in activities that she enjoys. Stick as much to her regular routine as possible, however, so as not to agitate or confuse her. Depending on her condition, dinner at home may be less stressful than taking her out to a fancy restaurant, for example.

If nobody directly involved in the person's care has the inclination, ability, or time to research assistive technology, volunteer to do this. Software can provide computerized or voice-activated medication and appointment reminders, for example. Assistive devices and sensors can locate lost objects and detect overheated rooms, floods, carbon monoxide, wandering, or falls. Ask your local Alzheimer's Association branch or a geriatric care manager for suggestions appropriate to this particular situation.