- Have you ever come to visit and found the temperature of the house inappropriate (much too hot or too cold)?
- Are cupboards full of multiple units of the same item, more than she could reasonably consume?
- Is the refrigerator full of expired or spoiled food?
- Is the refrigerator nearly empty?
- Do you see any melted pots or pans with burned bottoms?
- Do you see signs of spills that haven't been mopped?
- Are there piles of unopened mail or obviously unread newspapers?
- Can you smell urine?
When you visit, keep alert for these signs that she's not keeping up with everyday home care. Simply buying the same foods over and over (a particular brand of cereal, 20 varieties of vinegar) is a memory problem that may seem harmless, if expensive. But forgetting to turn off burners, turn up thermostats, clean spills, or throw out old food represent safety hazards.
Other more obvious and more ominous warning signs that someone may no longer be able to live alone include:
- Having electricity or water shut off because bills have gone unpaid
- Letters thanking her for her contribution to a charitable organization that you're not aware she has a history of supporting
- Robbery (because she let someone in the house unsuspectingly or left a door unlocked)
- Wandering from home or getting lost
