Tips for Dementia Caregivers: Hospital Do's and Dont's

As a caregiver, you can't be expected to be an expert in medicine. You are, however, the best expert about your loved one's particular care and comfort. And when someone with dementia is hospitalized, hospital staff need your expertise as much as you need theirs (although some of them don't always realize this at first).

The following four tips can improve the quality of your loved one's care:

4 things to do

1. Do: Spend as much time at bedside as you can.

By sticking close to your loved one's side, you can be a reassuring presence in a stressful and unfamiliar situation. Hospitalization's chaos and loss of familiar routines is disorienting to someone with dementia; both the situation and health issues can increase confusion.

Your loved one might forget where he or she is and why; you can gently orient as to place and purpose: "We're in the hospital because you fell down and got hurt."

By staying close, you're also in a better position to monitor your loved one for pain or other needs and convey information to medical staff. And, in turn, you can answer their questions and be an advocate for your loved one. If you can't be there, consider exploring other options.

2. Do: Share with hospital staff your tips about what works to soothe your loved one.

You know better than anyone what works and what hinders effective communication with and cooperation from your loved one. Don't be shy about offering suggestions:

• "She doesn't like to be called by her first name."

• "He's more cooperative after a snack."

• "She really likes listening to music on the iPod, if that's all right; I think it will calm her."

A diagnosis of dementia should be there in the person's chart, but orderlies, nurses, the person with the meal menus, and others in the large cast of participants in hospital care won't check everything in the records every time. So issue quiet reminders of this if the staffer doesn't seem to realize. You could even post a sign on the door: "Reminder: Mrs. Jones has moderate dementia." Your loved one won't see it, or overhear you, and the staff will appreciate the gentle prod.