What to do when someone with Alzheimer's acts
At some point in the course of the disease, people with Alzheimer's may become physically aggressive, although this does not occur as often as popular wisdom says. They may sometimes throw things, hit, kick, bite, or pinch the caregiver or others they come into contact with.
Recognize that acting out is often a symptom of the disease
People with Alzheimer's may not know why they are doing this, and they may not even realize that they are doing it. Nonetheless, these displays of behavior can be very frightening. Try to remember that these behaviors are probably an indication that the person with Alzheimer's is very upset about something.
When it looks like he is getting upset, and may seem to be spoiling for a fight, perhaps using threatening language, you may feel frightened and tempted to fight back. Try to stay calm, use a reassuring tone, and distract the person.
Usually, your friend or relative will calm down in a few minutes if you do not bother him.
Take steps to avoid injury
Don't try to restrain the person. This could cause serious injury to both of you.
1. Get out of striking distance. Step away so that he cannot reach you.
2. Call for help if you need it. You can call a friend, family member, or neighbor to help you get the person calmed down. If you have to, you can also call 911 or your local emergency number.
3. Try to avoid creating a situation in which the person will feel threatened. This will only make him more upset. When things have calmed down figure out what has set him off using the ABC method. What seems like violent behavior may be the way he's responding to changes in his brain or to events that he doesn't understand, and interprets as dangerous in some way. These might be an unfamiliar person entering the room, attempts to take something away from him, fear of being hurt, an exaggerated response to something happening suddenly, not knowing how to express anger appropriately, or just an effort to avoid complying with a demand.
It is easy to forget that what you think is a very natural way to behave may seem frightening or threatening to a confused person with dementia. The positive approach described in the ABC method may help avoid these distressing events.
The sharing above has helped me to better understand how to deal with anger issues. This is my first experience in caring for someone with AD.
The article is another one that is helping me to understand behaviors in Alzheimer's disease and in particularly one of my residents.
My husband has spells of aggression.
My husband does not have Alzheimers but was diagnosed with progressive dementia tabout ten years ago. It is is moving very slowly which I know I should be greatful for because my Mom had Alzheimers for several years before she died and it was very difficult seeing her regress. My husband also has severe depression causing sleep deprivation and Diabetes affecting his balance and motor control. He has been on Excelon for about 4 years but he was off last week for 3 days in a row. Since then he has been more confused so I guess I've been in some denial about his condition. You get used to it you know? He is also very angry not only for feeling e-masculated by the diseases (he's aware of his dementia) but also complaining about aging. Luckily he has never been violent. How do you all handle that? I take my dogs for walks and still work full time (to relax a little). :)
I would like to say that for some of you that are suffering from violence, abuse and /or loud yelling caused by the person your taking care of - it may be a passing phase of the disease like it has been for my mother. She was diagnosed with AD about 10 years ago. The behavior started a year or two into it. At first it was like she seemed to get agitated with me at something and start yelling. This was upsetting but the worst of it was that she was disturbing the neighbors especially in the summer with the windows open. My house is on a quite street and the houses are very close. At first I would end up so upset that I would end up yelling at her to stop. I soon realized that only made things worst. Of course I told the Neighbors about my mother's problem and most understood, but the woman next door on one side, who is an RN, just told me to "deal with it " ! At one point she said that if she heard yelling again she would call the police. Sure enough the next night she did. I was so upset when came that I just burst out in tears. Two police officers arrived and I tried to explain immediately but they questioned us both each in turn. Of course my mother was all sweetness and light and said that there was nothing wrong. Thankfully the police understood and left. Well the behavior continued and I worked very hard to contain the noise. Not many months had passed when her behavior started to include more than verbal abuse. She became violent. By now I had tried the things the doctors tell you to do like misdirecting, changing the subject,walking away etc. Then I tried humor like when one time she was flinging the heavy grates on my gas stove at me again I told her I was getting to old to dodge the grates. The humor helped me but not her. I should mention that after an incident when she was calm I would sometimes show her a bruise or a bite mark or something she had broken and she was always surprised and sorry. Eventually I discovered that music kept her calm and I started putting it on softly all day. I found a radio station that plays the oldies and bought some cds that had songs from the 40's. It worked. My family had always loved music and my father, who has been dead for almost 30 years,. used to sing all the time. She started sining and sometimes I would join in. At that stage she could remember dad and the old days and that led to some pleasant conversations. It wasn't perfect. This high anxiety stage lasted for a few years. I suspect it stopped when she was no longer frustrated by what was happening to her. I remember one time when she was trying to thread a needle and she couldn't she said " I'm not going to let this thing get to me". This was a woman that had been a master stitcher/tailor. She would make every thing from suits to wedding gowns. What must she had been thinking? For the last few years she has drifted to the point she doesn't remember the past but still enjoys the music. She sings less and does not initiate it. So I keep it up and some days she sings along with me. She is actually very lovable now like a puppy and needs to see me when I'm in another room. She'll find me and we will hug and I guess that gives her reassurance. I appreciate it to because when I was a child although loving, she was not demonstrative like my father was. I would say that this is the only thing that makes what I do for her bearable sometimes. Well this long story was only to encourage people who are dealing with this behavior. Knowing that this too will pass may allow you to keep your loved one home with you and not in a nursing home. Hang in there. W We are doing God's work.
dear jackierose...my husband is very suspicious, so I know how that can hurt ones feelings. We just have to keep reminding ourselves its the disease talking..not our loved one.
Reminding me to try and distract him, rather than try to reason with him. At times, I forget that he is not able to discuss things like we used to.
to Jackierose. I am going thru the same things with my Mom but I have learned to accept the fact that person is not my Mom it is the disease. It does hurt but you just have to remember that your Mom loves and loved you and she would never do or say things if it were not for this awful disease....
My mom has been very combatitive, wanting to argue about everything, and very abusive with her language. This is not how she ever was thru all the years I have known her. I'm not sure how to handle this constant negativity of me. She thinks I am trying to take something away from her, she is suspicious of everything I try to do for her....this hurts me terribly and I would like other peoples input on this matter....Thank you.
Reassurance that I am not the only one figting this awful life!